Gardening 102

My gardening skills (or rather attemps at gardening) are as yet unpolished and I certainly admit that I lack some basic intrinsic understanding of what to do to be successful. Bottom line translation: I really think that God decided when I was created to just let me sit back and watch and let the experts do their job. For example, last week I decided to get going on some very much needed hedging on the multitude of shrubbery esconcing our yard. (Esconce, pretty good word huh?) Anyway, I wanted to get it done before my husband arrived home from work and mowed the yard. Later on in the evening we were expecting 7 of our good friends over for dinner and socializing in the back yard so I wanted to do my part to make sure the backyard looked great and well tended.



I decided since the yard is pretty big to use our longest extension cord, the bright orange 100 foot one. Not finding an outlet outside I plugged it in, in our kitchen and left the back door open slightly for the cord to snake through. Next, I grabbed the hedger, plugged in the cord and spent the next 40 minutes or so hedging away. Okay, let's put it this way...I trimmed a good 10 to 15 shrubs on a very steep incline before I decided I was done for the day. On my way back down the slope I pulled a few weeds and noticed one of our longest shrubs could use a little trimming, so I immediately began to give it a grooming. All of sudden the hedger threw sparks everywhere, and I gave a good shriek! Our neighbor next door has a tiler working on installing an outside barbeque bar, so I am sure he wondered what the heck was going on. Anyway, I was sort of shook up and decided that the hedger had finally gone bust. I remembered we had purchased it in Oregon so I calculated it was at least 8 to 9 years old. Oh well, time to get a new one. After setting the hedger down on the wrought iron table I elected to wash down the teak patio set since so many of our friends were coming over and we would need both patio sets. So I washed it all down, and then realized I hadn't collected the length of cord off the lawn where Robert was going to mow shortly. I started pulling the cord up to the patio area and then stopped when I thought I should get the weeds I pulled out of the way first. Well, when I bent down to pick up the weeds I suddenly saw about 2 feet of the extension cord lying on the ground severed from the rest of the cord! Well this was good and bad news. The good news was the hedger was not dead after all; the bad news was I had unknowingly killed the longest extension cord in the house and it was the one Robert needed when he came home to do the edging. Ohoh! Then I realized the cord was still plugged into the kitchen wall and I had left a live wire on the lawn while I had washed down the patio set! Well, then there was even more good news! I had not set the lawn on fire nor had I electrocuted myself. Yea God! There was only one other piece of bad news and that was telling my loving, adorable, understanding spouse what I had done. Needless to say I was laughing very hard when I tried to call him and let him know before he came home. Only problem was he had already left work. I had to call someone so I called my friend Chris and I was laughing the whole time, when suddenly I heard the garage door open...Oh no! My husband was home and I had to tell him the truth. Yikes! Needless to say, he could only shake his head, and with that stunned look on his face, "Nance I don't know how you do it." Quite frankly, I don't either, it's a talent I have when it comes to gardening!

PS One of our friends took the 2 feet of severed cord and laid it on my pillow later that night--- I guess to wish me sweet, electrifying dreams. Ha!